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Gavin Newsom Suggests Draining Lake Tahoe to Solve Future Droughts

Lake Tahoe has 39 trillion gallons of water. That is enough water to supply everyone in the United States with 75 gallons per day for five years.
President Donald Trump and his chief advisor Steve Bannon drunk on malt liquor.

After Two-Week Drinking Bender, Trump and Bannon Finally Get to Work

After almost a two week drinking binge, President Trump and his chief advisor Steve Bannon have finally decided to get to the business of the country. Both men have been drinking heavily since the inauguration on January 20th.
Monsignor William Lynn says Father O'Brien's condition might be due to fluoride in tap water.

Priest Blames Fluoride In Water For Pedophilia

Monsignor William Lynn, who has been in and out of prison for hiding evidence linked to priest pedophilia, says Father O'Brien's condition might be due to fluoride in tap water.

Waterford Whispers News Mistaken For Nursing Home Newsletter

Residents awoke to copies of what they thought would be their normal nursing home newsletter, but instead they found Waterford Whispers News stories.
A pre-release cover of the Bristol edition provided by Playboy Enterprises. (click for full cover)

Bristol Palin to Pose in Last Issue of Playboy

Playboy Enterprises, parent of the popular men's magazine playboy announced that Bristol Palin will be featured in its last "frontal" issue in September. The Magazine, which recently announced that it planned to halt pictorials of nude models, said the Palin issue will allow the publication to "go out with a bang."
Protesters, lead by Nevada City's Sairhra Ramun, held a demonstration out in front of Grass Valley's Del Oro Theater.

Protests Break Out Over Proposed Blazing Saddles Showing

Protests broke out late this week as a group of activists marched in front of Grass Valley's Del Oro Theater after the establishment announced plans to show a special matinee of Mel Brooks 1974 comedy film Blazing Saddles.

Greece to Implement the “Zimbabwe Plan” to Ease Liquidity Woes

The Athenian government announced at the close of business Monday night that they have enlisted a number of "Zimbabwe Financial Experts" to help inject desperately needed liquidity into the faltering economy.
Julian Assange has been offered political Asylum in Nevada City, CA.

Julian Assange Mistakenly Blamed For Syrian Chemical Attack

A disturbing report released early this week that Wikileaks founder Julian Assange was responsible for the recent chemical attacks in Syria has been debunked by Snopes.com.
A triumphant Hillary Clinton is rejoicing after God's endorsement of same-sex marriage.

5 Million Uncounted Sanders Ballots Found On Clinton’s Email Server

Presumptive Democratic nominee Hillary Clinton is in hot water again after nearly 5 million uncounted California electronic ballots were found on her email server by the F.B.I.

Tom Cruise Leaves Scientology

Tom Cruise announced yesterday that he was leaving the Church of Scientology to avoid hefty tax penalties after the the church recently lost its tax-exempt status.
After years of research we now have flying cats.

GMO Cat Food Study Finds Amazing Results

Cat food brands using GMO corn in their products have been linked to a new development in the Felis Catus species (house cat).  Studies conducted at Purina's Headquarters conducted long-term tests and research into the GMO cat food.
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