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Paranoia from the right wing about liberal media is growing now more than ever.

Area Man Won’t Be Baited Into Liberal Media

Local Trump supporter and protest attendee, Brandon Whosville--aged somewhere between 18-23 based on vocabulary analysis alone--publicly stated in a Facebook group that, "he wouldn't be baited into making headlines that help the left" referring of course, to the "left wing/right wing" ideology that makes up the structure of modern American politics.
Famous film director and writer David Lynch speculated that he invented the small California Central Valley town of Farmersville.

Area Town Fears It Only Exists in David Lynch’s Imagination

Famous film director and writer David Lynch speculated that he invented the small California Central Valley town of Farmersville.
White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer is quitting his post to pursue his life-long dream of following the rock band Phish.

Former White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer Enjoying His New Life Following Rock Band...

In a shocking turn of events, former White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer announced he was following the rock band Phish.
Some of the 67 participants in this year's International

International Boron Appreciation Day Passes Without Notice

International Boron Appreciation Day passed without notice on Wednesday. Officials of the relatively unknown holiday date said there were no parades, no fireworks and certainly no Boron giveaways at participating fast food restaurants largely because none participated.
Grainy Photo taken by Mr. Bradenshauer of Alta Sierra

Alta Sierra Man Swears He Spotted Bigfoot

Keith Bradenshauer swears he spotted Bigfoot Saturday night along Norlene Dr. on his way back from making a payment on his Check Cashing Service advance.

Area Woman to Sell Tin Foil Hats on Etsy.com

Like many others in Nevada County, Merrilee Longshoes is concerned about her family’s health, and how it is being negatively impacted by electromagnetic radiation. EMR is generated by all wireless devices, including cell phone towers, smart phones, microwave ovens, and PG&E’s smart meters.
A group of biology students from the University of Oregon have created Roundup resistant weeds.

Anti-Monsanto Activists Create Roundup Resistant Weeds

A group of environmental activists based out of Eugene, Oregon announced via Twitter that they have developed several species of weeds that are resistant to Monsanto's popular herbicide Roundup.
The esteemed CNN broadcaster is hiding a secret.

Wolf Blitzer Diagnosed With Dementia

For the last few years there have been murmurings around CNN that something just wasn’t right with Wolf. Now the cat is out of the bag and Wolf is chasing it around the parking lot.
“Ouch! That hurt! Get her fucking foot out of my ass,” Senator Ted Cruz (R-TX) could be heard.

Doctors Rushing to Remove Sally Yates’ Foot from Ted Cruz’s Rectum

After a contentious exchange during a hearing of the Senate Judiciary Committee, first responders and D.C. Metro Police are confirming that medical crews are hurriedly trying to remove former Acting Attorney General Sally Yates' foot from the rectum of a sitting though at the moment rather uncomfortably U.S. Senator.

Inside Pictures of Trump’s Inauguration Preparation

Several photos have leaked onto the Internet featuring Donald Trump preparing for his inauguration. A couple have raised concerns about the 45th President's ruling style with seem to suggest a much more authoritarian approach to leading the world's most power country.

ISIS “Poop Beards” Used as a Weapon of Mass Destruction

Following a recent and sensational report that men's beards as dirty as toilets, the Middle Eastern terrorist group known as ISIL or ISIS has decided to put their mandatory Islamic facial hair to good use: they're loading their beards up with deadly bacteria.
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