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Construction workers were terrified to find a monstrous Sarlacc during their repairs of the giant sinkhole in Grass Valley.

Giant Sarlacc Discovered in Grass Valley Sinkhole

Local workers made a startling discovery when performing repairs on Grass Valley’s seven-story tall sinkhole on Freeman Lane. While shoring up and placing supports at the foot of the sinkhole, a Sarlacc suddenly appeared from below devouring three workers and two earthmovers in a matter of seconds.

Recently Discovered 1994 Study Reveals 5G Causes Cancer

Palo Alto, CA -- Palo Alto-based Rundex Family Foundation has confirmed that Nevada City's local documentary producer, and sometimes politician, Saihra Ramun has produced heavily redacted Freedom...
Is Vice President Pence a closet Iron Maiden fan?

Mike Pence a Closet Iron Maiden Fan, Claims College Boyfriend

New revelations from an old "friend" of Vice President Mike Pence claim that the now ultra-conservative, evangelical Christian was a closet fan of the 1980s heavy metal band Iron Maiden.
Jerry Heard of Truckee, CA is in a funk because he hasn't lived up to the promises of his underarm deodorant.

Area Man Fails to Live Up to the Promises of His Deodorant

A Truckee man has sunk into a deep depression after realizing that his underarm deodorant failed to create the manliness he was looking for. 31-year-old Jerry Heard came to this discovery after his trust Old Spice "Swagger"  didn't actually produce any actual swagger in his life.
California Senate Bill 4320.1 will ban all "single-use" toothpicks after 2022.

California to Ban Sandwich Toothpicks

California Senate Bill 4320.1 will ban all "single-use" toothpicks after 2022.
The new California High Speed Railroad will be funded by paper bag fees.

California Plastic Bag Tax to be Used for New High Speed Train

As Californians woke January 1st to a new voter-approved plastic bag ban, few realized that the new 10 cent bag fees in grocery stores are being funneled into the grossly over-budget California high speed railroad train project.
Everyone is afraid of Dick Cheney, including former President George Bush.

Government Time Machine To Transport Extremists to Middle Ages

White House officials have told Gish Gallop that it has been developing a "Time Machine" to transport various extremists back to the Middle Ages.

Local Beekeepers Stung in Honey Oil Raid

Members of the Nevada County Nevada County Sheriff’s Narcotics Task Force served a warrant Sunday afternoon at a residence located on Dog Bar Road, locating what was descried as the largest scale butane honey oil (“BHO”) lab ever found in Nevada County.
Following the Las Vegas shooting, Trump supporters took to Facebook demanding the travel ban be expanded to all 50 states. Trump seen here showing off his executive order banning Muslims from entering the country.

Trump Supporters Demand Expanding Travel Ban to All 50 States

Following the horrific domestic terrorist attack in Las Vegas that has left over 50 people dead and hundreds injured, Trump supporters have taken to social media demanding that President Trump expand his recent travel ban to include all 50 States.
The American public is busy labeling this article as fake news.

Study: 31% of Facebook Users Will Comment “Fake News!” About This Article

The Palo Alto-based Rundex Family Foundation has/is performing a real-time examination of this very article you are reading and has determined that 31% of all social media users will label this article as "fake news" without even taking the time to read the article.

Area Man Accidentally Terrorizes Save Mart with Axe

According to sources leaving the store, Mr. Morgan didn't go on a murderous rampage through the grocery store, but rather was walking around the aisles with a young boy holding what appeared to be a 6 to 8 lb. maul axe.
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