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Donald Trump annoucing his new 2016 Campaign Biopic My Struggle.

Trump to Release Campaign Biopic

The president elect Donald J. Trump organization announced yesterday that the controversial Republican is planning on releasing a updated biopic of the 2016 election season entitled My Struggle.
April Smith having a hard day at Staples

Stapler Fails Staples Checkout Clerk

A stapler failed to staple at the Grass Valley Staples on Friday when checker April Smith attempted to staple multiple receipts to a customer's order.

Jared Fogle Released From Prison

Former Subway spokesman, Jared Fogle, has been released from prison due what authorities say was overcrowding.

Satire Publication Apologizes for Accidentally Reporting Real News

An area satire publication apologizes for publishing real news labeled as satire.

Gish Gallop Review: Finnegans Wake is an Impenetrable Piece of Crap

What's the difference between a pile of dog crap and Finnegan's Wake? You can avoid the dog crap by walking around it. I have to read and review Finnegan's Wake.
Former Secretary of State Colin Powell

Lesser Publicized Excerpts From Colin Powell’s Leaked Emails

While some of his emails might contain biting commentary on the Clintons and Trump, some other emails of Powell's contained lesser-publicized, but perhaps just as newsworthy bits of information, and this website has decided it's in the public's best interest to publish excerpts from those emails

Area Meat Cutter Has Had It With Chicken Breasts

Area meat cutter Paul Payne is just about out of patience with his customers. He's worked behind the counter as a meat cutter answering locals' questions about fish, meat and poultry for over 17 year. However late Monday night towards the end of his shift, he confided in his boss Joe Wright that he was sick and tired of explaining chicken breasts to his customers.

Illinois Farmer Donates Entire Unsold Soybean Crop to Local Food Bank

A Dixon farmer came up with a charitable solution for his unsold soybeans.

Water Runs into the Ocean, Trump Points Out

President Trump gave a concerning and rambling speech about water and Iran during a press conference about a $16 billion farm bail-out package.
The resemblance between Bill Hicks and Alex Jones is uncanny.

Bill Hicks Kills Off Unpopular “Alex Jones” Character/Says Joke No Longer Funny

In what some consider to be the longest running prank in the modern era has come to an abrupt end this week when famed comedian Bill Hicks finally killed off his controversial and unpopular character Alex Jones claiming "it's not funny anymore."
Conor McGregor and Floyd Mayweather will don modern male "rompers" during their next match.

Mayweather and McGregor To Wear Rompers During Fight

Conor McGregor and Floyd Mayweather will come together in an epic boxing match on August 26. The fight is expected to earn the fighters upwards of $180 million dollars, but it is not what the fight would mean if Mayweather loses that has captivated audiences.
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