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Ben Carson: Obamacare Stealing Your Identity and Cloning Your Poo

As I was investigating this debauchery, it occurred to me, my poo is already smarter than a Democrat. Can you imagine how dim a Democrat’s poo is? Worse, can you imagine how obtuse a Democrat poo clone would be?
Marilyn McDonald is happy with the weight she lost after getting the Zika Virus on vacation in Brazil.

Area Woman Reaches Goal Weight With Zika Virus

Marilyn McDonald is finally happy with the progress she made after losing almost 24 lbs after returning from a 2 week vacation in Brazil where she became ill with the Zika Virus.

Satire Publication Apologizes for Accidentally Reporting Real News

An area satire publication apologizes for publishing real news labeled as satire.

Texas Legalizes Smoking At Gas Stations

Most Texans support the new law designed to keep "foreign influence" out.
Jason Brandt of Grass Valley, CA and his soapboax car that got him jail time.

Fix-it Ticket Leads to Jail Time for Area Man

Mr. Brandt was pulled over and ticketed near the bottom of the Alta St. hill by a Grass Valley police officer for not having proper registration tags on his vehicle.

Area Researcher: The Mars Curiosity Rover’s Photos are Faked

Area researcher Skyy Wolford announced to a largely disinterested crowd in front of the North San Juan Sierra Super Stop that the Mars Curiosity Rover never landed on Mars, and has been roving the grass lands outside the Truckee, CA airport.
Veteran television journalist Gwen Ifill has died at the age of 61.

Gish Gallop Salutes Our Heroes: Gwen Ifill Dead at 61.

Veteran television journalist Gwen Ifill, the longtime host of PBS’ “Washington Week” and co-anchor of “PBS NewsHour,” has died. She was 61. A PBS spokesperson confirmed that Ifill passed away Monday after a months-long battle with cancer.

New Girl Scout Cookies Address Wage Inequality

This year the Girl Scouts of America have expanded their social outreach to include some of the more pressing issues confronting Women across the world. To accomplish this, the 103 year old organization has announced a limited-time line of what they are calling "awareness cookies" which will augment the current cookie offerings which include Carmel deLites, formerly known as Samoas, Peanut Butter Patties and the family hoarding favorite, Thin Mints.
North American Man Boy Love Association (NAMBLA) has endorsed Ted Cruz for President.

NAMBLA Endorses Ted Cruz

The controversial organization North American Man Boy Love Association (NAMBLA), has given its endorsement to Ted Cruz. NAMBLA believes that it is OK and natural for men to "love" boys. They believe it to be the natural order of things and that it should be celebrated.

California Appellate Court Rejects Fake News Chemtrail Defense

Jackson, CA resident David Johanson lost his appeal in Sacramento this past week.

Rumors of Trump’s Stroke Mostly Untrue

The White House is denying any health concerns.
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