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Apple, Inc. CEO Tim Cook apologized for auto-correct this past week.

Apple CEO Apologizes For Auto-correct: We Were Just Messing with People

Current Apple, Inc. CEO Tim Cook made a surprising announcement late this week apologizing for installing the spelling "auto-correct" functions on it's popular line of smartphones and tablets. According to the press release, Mr. Cook said "it was a joke" and promised to work with its customers to remove the functionality from its devices.

Leaked FEMA Document: Motel 6 To Be Used as Emergency Camps

According to the conservative site RightWingNewsNow! who obtained an exclusive leaked Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA) document, the disaster preparation organization has been funneling millions of dollars over the past 40 years into the budget hospitality company Motel 6.
Conspiracy theorist Alex Jones is calling on Trump supporters to join the reenactments of the upcoming globalist civil war being held across the country in October.

Alex Jones Calls on Supporters to Participate in the Upcoming “Globalist Civil War” Reenactment... conspiracy theorist  and media personal Alex Jones called on his supporters today to participate in nation-wide re-enactment of what he called "the civil war that's coming" in an attempt to draw attention to "deep state forces" that are attempting to "overthrow the Trump presidency."

Waterford Whispers News Mistaken For Nursing Home Newsletter

Residents awoke to copies of what they thought would be their normal nursing home newsletter, but instead they found Waterford Whispers News stories.
The Associated Press has proclaimed the Golden State Warriors 2016 Champions.

Golden State Warriors Win NBA Championship, According to the Associated Press

The American professional basketball team Golden State Warriors have won the NBA championship, the Associated Press (AP) has announced
Horace "Bored" Georgeman in his Lake Wildwood home office

Gish Gallop Reporter Killed in Car Accident: Horace Georgeman 1933-2015

As the author of over 45 Gish Gallop articles, Horace "Bored" Georgeman became a national sensation overnight after publishing his groundbreaking investigations.
White House advisor Jared Kushner is following in his Father-in-law's footsteps.

Jared Kushner in Talks to Sell Steak in Real Estate Tech Firm

Jared Kushner, a senior level White House official and son-in-law of President Donald Trump, is in talks to follow in his father-in-law’s footsteps by selling steak in his real estate company, according to a report by Bon Appétit Magazine.

Virginia University Offering American History Course for Russian Trolls

The George Mason School of Economics is offering an innovative online program for Russian Troll Farms to help instill chaos on social media platforms such as Facebook.

CDC Confirms Patient Zero in Toilet Paper Factory

So you've been hoarding toilet paper?
Legendary guitar player and King Crimson founder Robert Fripp is retiring to teach guitar at a Derry, New Hampshire music store.

Robert Fripp Retires to Teach Guitar in Derry, New Hampshire

Esteemed progressive guitar player Robert Fripp announced that he is retiring from his leadership position in King Crimson, and plans on spending his days at a Derry, New Hampshire's Smash Music located on East Broadway Street.

Flaccid Men’s Rights Activist Should Have Taken the Blue Pill

The Blue Pill would have helped a Newcastle Mens Rights Activist keep his tassel at attention.