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Janet Williams of Cedar Ridge

Area Woman Excited About Receiving 6″-10″ This Week

Cedar Ridge resident and professional shopper Janet Williams updated her Facebook status today telling her friends that she's actually looking forward to receiving 6 to 10 inches this week.

500 Rushed To Hospitals After Attending Trump Rally

Local hospitals in the Canton area have been inundated with patients approximately one hour after the Trump rally.
Urine is the secret ingredient in many San Francisco sourdough breads.

New Book: Urine Secret Ingredient in San Francisco Sourdough Bread

Long before Rice-a-Roni was 'the San Francisco treat,' the city by the bay was known for one of the most ancient form of bread making: Sourdough.

Law That Hillary Clinton Deserves To Go To Jail For Breaking On The Tip...

HOBART, ARKANSAS -- Clem O'Connell is certain of many things in life. He is certain that socialism always fails unless it's called Social Security, Medicare, or the United States Armed Forces. He is certain...
A new Study by the Rundex Family Foundation suggests you are more likely to get injured from a falling can than a Muslim refugee.

Study: Local Grocery Outlet Supermarket More Dangerous Than Muslim Refugees

A 3 month emergency study by the Palo Alto-base Rundex Family Foundation has concluded that you are more like to be injured shopping in the Grass Valley Grocery Outlet Supermarket, than from a refugee from one of the 7 recently banned countries.
Telsa and SpaceX super genius Elon Musk plans on relaunching the popular 1970s and 80s American drama comedy The Love Boat.

Elon Musk to Relaunch TV’s The Love Boat…in Space

Telsa and SpaceX super genius Elon Musk plans on relaunching the popular 1970s and 80s American drama comedy The Love Boat.

AR-15-Wielding Disney World Alligator Attacks Vacationing Boy

Police warn people to stay away from ponds with alligators and to wear ballistic vests when swimming.
Terry Adkinson isn't sure where Brussels is, but he knows Donald Trump will fix whatever is wrong with it.

Area Man Not Sure Where Brussels Is

As the world is trying to understand the recent terror attacks in Europe, an area man admitted to his waiter in the Asian Gardens Chinese Restaurant that he has no idea where Brussels is. Terry Adkinson, 62, holds strident opinions on world affairs and is a proud Donald Trump supporter.
Fernwood Z. Frischland, Esq.

Local Schizophrenic Lawyer Sues Self for Fall

Nevada County is about to make legal history as Fernwood Z. Frischland, Esq., filed a civil suit against himself for a nasty fall he suffered in front of his home at 24444 Old Tunnel Road.
Starting in January of 2017, Oregon citizens will be able to pump their own gasoline.

Oregon to Force Customers to Pump Gas

In the first change to laws that were put in place in 1951, the Oregon State Legislature has voted to abandon the requirement that only gasoline station attendants can pump gas, and require that its customers do it. The controversial bill passed both government houses and the governor has promised to sign it.
Tim Savini of Oceanside, was described by his friends as being kind of temperamental

A California Man Commits Suicide During Karaoke Night

Tragedy struck earlier this week when a man took his own life in a local bar. Oceanside, California's Fremont Bar and Grill was having it's Saturday karaoke with it's usual mix of locals and Japanese tourists.