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Wrightsboro hog farmer George Reed Wambles took it upon himself to take care of what he called "the fake news media hysteria."

Hurricane Florence Found Dead on Southern Man’s Front Porch

Wrightsboro hog farmer George Reed Wambles took it upon himself to take care of what he called "the fake news media hysteria."
Wile E. Coyote seconds before his untimely and ironic death.

Wile E. Coyote Murdered After Making Cancer Treatment Discovery

Wile E. Coyote, former roadrunner chaser turned scientist, was found dead outside of his cancer research lab yesterday. He had been crushed to death by a falling anvil.
JJP Cube a.k.a. Lethal Chrome in his bedroom studio

Local Unplugged Musician Reduced to Silence

Local hip-hop, dubstep and general techno musician "JP Cube a.k.a. Lethal Chrome" has been reduced to 45 minutes of silence after attempting to produce an "unplugged" album of his most popular songs.

Pope Francis Proposes Friday Sabbath

Pope Francis has delivered a sweeping encyclical officially amending doctrine to move the Christian Sabbath from Sunday to Friday.
Richard H. Thorndyke seen here recovering in Midland Memorial Hospital after his "sympathy" back alley vasectomy.

Texas Man Hospitalized After “Back Alley” Vasectomy

A Midland Texas man is in stable condition at Midland Memorial Hospital after he decided to have a "back alley" vasectomy in the neighboring town of Odessa.
Assistant Sizzler Manager James Knight says he can't afford the $350,000 "donation" to get into George Clooney's Clinton fundraising event next month.

Area Sizzler Manager Unable to Attend George Clooney Fundraising Event

Sizzler assistant manager James Knight of Tustin, CA said he will not be able to attend the upcoming George Clooney fundraising event for Hillary Clinton because "he is not filthy rich."
The Clintons are in hot water for some remarks they made about dogs.

Clintons Blasted By South Carolina ASPCA

A major gaffe on the part of Hillary and Bill Clinton has the entire state of South Carolina and the DNC buzzing. At a $10,000 per plate dinner at the affluent Myrtle Beach Dog Breeders Association, Bill and Hillary dropped a faux pas of epic proportion.
If you didn't vote for Donald Trump, or you even look like someone who didn't vote for him, he plans on suing you.

Donald Trump Threatens to Sue ‘Any American’ That Didn’t Vote for Him

The billionaire real estate mogul and former reality-TV star and President of the United States told reporters this week at a press conference held at the White House that he plans on suing anyone who didn't vote for him.
Jeff and Eva make a triumphant return to Naked and Afraid: Nevada City.

Naked and Afraid Episode to be Filmed in Downtown Nevada City, CA

The popular Discovery Channel docudrama Naked and Afraid will be filming in Nevada City during the summer shooting season, Gish Gallop has learned. Filming is set for the July time-frame, with the "ahead" production team arriving in June to prepare the town for a bunch of naked people.
Grace Bowles of Grass Valley is raising $40,000 to send Fleshlights to troops overseas.

Area Woman Raises Funds To Ship Fleshlights To Troops Overseas

Area women Grace Bowles has started a GoFundMe campaign to raise money for Fleshlights to be deployed soldiers overseas.

Recent Murders Reveal Unlikely Suspect

A North Church Street cat accidentally ingested an entire stash of methamphetamine late this week and went on a murderous rampage. After eating what authorities claim was a small amount of "Biznack," Abu, the name of the male black cat, not only destroyed the inside of the small studio home, but also killed both occupants.
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