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Stephen King Spotted at Local Grocery Outlet

American author of contemporary horror, supernatural fiction, suspense, science fiction, and fantasy Stephen King was spotted this weekend shopping at the popular discount supermarket Grocery Outlet.

Wife Divorces Man After He Compares Her to Sarah Palin

Brenda Nicklas of Grass Valley had it with her husband's non-stop and obsessive discussions about politics. Ted Nicklas, Brenda's husband, is a staunch Trump supporter with strident and conservative positions on many of today's news topics.
The last known picture of the official white house cat Almond Roca. Source: unknown.

Trump Family Cat Defects To Russia

Almond Roca, the White House cat is a gray tabby who was rescued by the Pence family from Paws and Prayers, a Christian/Gay Conversion animal rescue in Indiana and given as a gift to Melania and Baron Trump.
A substantial grant from the Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump Foundation has enabled Shriners Hospitals to offer new controversial services.

Jared Kushner Behind Shriners New Gender Reassignment Services

A substantial grant from the Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump Foundation has enabled Shriners Hospitals to offer new controversial services.
Doctors around the world are excited for this new development.

Merck Teams Up With Pepsi Co. To Make New Drink

The pharmaceutical giant, Merck & Co. is working with the people at Pepsi Co. to create and market a new beverage line.

Evangelical Christian Thrift Store Fast-Tracked to Meet Jesus

A Northern Californa Christian thrift store is defying a recent state-wide order to close.
Special sunglasses when worn, change the appearance of Trump supporters to "skeleton-like monsters."

New Sunglasses Out Trump Supporters

A construction worker named John Nada claims to have discovered a way to identify supporters of Republican presidential contender Donald Trump. He says he stumbled upon a box of sunglasses that, when worn, change the appearance of Trump supporters to "skeleton-like monsters."
A 16 month study published this week claims that overuse of the CAP LOCKS key wastes valuable bandwidth and consumes as much 1.21 Gigawatts of power per year.

Keyboard CAPS LOCK Key Uses 10X More Bandwidth than Shift Key

A 16 month study by the Palo Alto, CA-based research firm the Rundex Family Foundation found that overuse of the CAPS lock key, especially on social media platforms, used 10 times more energy than normal capitalizations.

Local Admissions and Outreach Director Drinks Kombucha, Still Feels Empty Inside

She, unfortunately, failed to feel the immediate effects of its probiotic properties, and loses faith in her ability to accurately discern colors at this point in time.
The famous children's television street finally had to breakdown and give directions to itself.

Sesame Street Reluctantly Gives Directions to Itself

The famous children's television street finally had to breakdown and give directions to itself.

Trump to Replace Press Secretary with Twitter

The Donald Trump Presidential transition team announced today that it plans on conducting all communications directly via Twitter instead of the traditional press conference.
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