Area Man Not Sure Where Brussels Is

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Terry Adkinson isn't sure where Brussels is, but he knows Donald Trump will fix whatever is wrong with it.
Terry Adkinson isn’t sure where Brussels is, but he knows Donald Trump will fix whatever is wrong with it.

Grass Valley, CA — As the world is trying to understand the recent terror attacks in Europe, a Grass Valley man admitted to his waiter at the Asian Gardens Chinese Restaurant that he has no idea where Brussels is. Terry Adkinson, 62, holds strident opinions on world affairs and is a proud Donald Trump supporter.

“I don’t know where Brussels is. It’s a city in France or something,” said an angry Mr. Adkinson outside Asian Gardens, “but I do know they’re not doing a good job fighting Muslim terrorists. I mean, how many times are the French going to screw up and not close their borders? And you know, that’s waiting to happen here. Just waiting, I’m telling you. And Trump is our last hope.”

A National Geographic poll of over 500 Americans showed that six per cent failed to locate their own country on a map of the world. Among those with a high school education or less, the figure was one in ten. Only one in three could find Great Britain on a map. In the same group, two-thirds of the respondents estimated the population of the US at between 750 million and two billion. Three quarters said English was the most commonly spoken native language in the world. It is actually third, behind Mandarin Chinese and Spanish.

“Look, I don’t really care where Brussels is,” continued Mr. Adkinson who was noticeably getting agitated. “They’re all going to screw us. The politicians. There’s not one good one. They’re trying to bring America down and Muslims are a part of the that. Trump is the only candidate with the business skills and love for America that can save us. Heck, he’ll probably save Brussels too, wherever that is.”

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