Area Man Still Prefers Video Store Porn

Area man Wayne still prefers his porn the old-fashioned way.
Area man Wayne Kerr still prefers his porn the old-fashioned way.

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De Pere, WI The video rental business in the U.S. has collapsed from more than 19,000 brick-and-mortar retail stores at its peak down to under 5,000, according to the Rundex Family Foundation (RFF). Yet surprisingly, Family Video has added stores in recent years, attracting loyal, fap happy customers like Wayne Kerr.

Every Saturday morning growing up, Wayne and his father would travel to Family Video to rent the latest big budget Hollywood blockbuster.

But what really fascinated little Wayne about Family Video wasn’t the latest Hollywood movie or video game; it was the ‘adult section‘ at the back of the store.

“When dad wasn’t looking, I would sneak off to the adult section, you know, the secret room at the back of the store,” said Kerr. “I’d stick my head under those swinging, western type doors to see what was back there. When I found out, well, let’s just say I was intrigued.”

Wayne patiently counted down the days to his 18th birthday, when he opened a Family Video membership of his own and could legally rent X-rated films. “I remember it vividly,” Kerr recalls, “I was there at 10 a.m. when they opened. My hands were shaking with nervous excitement. I could finally rent the films I had sought after for years. Each title looked better than the next.  I was sweating profusely,” he said.

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Kerr even remembers the exact titles he brought home that day. “I rented Mandingo Massacre, Cockasian Creampies and Interracial Teens 3 on VHS. I was really into big black cocks fucking airtight teens. Man, my tastes sure have changed a lot since then,” Kerr laughed.

Such traditions have become outdated for most men, who now watch porn online for free on such sites as Pornhub and YouPorn, but for Kerr, he still loves the adrenaline rush he gets from driving to Family Video and picking out the perfect porno.

“I use both,” Kerr said, “but I prefer Family Video because their selection is better and there’s nothing like shooting huge jizz ropes to DVD.”

Although it may be more convenient to watch online, Kerr still enjoys draining his nuts in analog.

Kerr credits Family Video for their excellent selection of Blu Ray, 3-D Blu Ray, 4K and DVD’s that are not always easy to find online. “Family Video has a long, deep catalog of adult titles. Where else can you get the special boner features and behind-the-scenes exxxtras from Deep Anal Abyss?”

“Some days are slower than others,” says Family Video store manager, Hugh Jardon. “We have midweek deals, and rent-one-get-one-free deals.” Jardon said one thing streaming services will never have is customer service.

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Indecisive customers can ask Family Video’s friendly staff for recommendations. “A few days ago, a gentleman asked if we had any special new arrivals. I recommended Double Stuffed Buttfuck Sluts, Team Squirt 7 and 50 Guy Creampie. He called the next day to personally thank me,” Jardon said.

“I think it’s safe to assume that for some of these men, going to a video store has become part of the thrill,” said Anita Blackmon, head research analyst at the RFF, “because it’s certainly not cost-efficient. Somewhere along the line a wire got crossed and the physical act of renting has become so ingrained, it’s become a ritual. Most men who still rent porn simply cannot climax any other way,” she said.

For Mr. Kerr, he hopes Family Video will be around for future generations to enjoy.

“I hope Family Video is here to stay,” said Kerr, “so my son and my son’s son can experience perusing the adult section some day.”