Nevada City, CA — Banner Mountain work-from-home software engineer David L. Cook decided early Tuesday morning that he prefers the hold music on Indian conference calls over the bland and vapid tunes he hears on his American equivalent ones. Mr. Cook, who is an audiophile and amateur musician attends a Bangalore, India-hosted call three times a week.
“I have to be honest,” said Mr. Cook in a Gish Gallop telephone interview, “The Indian music is so much more interesting than this American crap I’m forced to listen to while I wait for the call moderator. I especially hate it when they try to do pop music. The crappy Baroque stuff is bad enough.”
Mr. Cook is a software developer for the Rundex Family Foundation Research Group based out of Palo Alto. He works out of his Nevada City, CA home office providing automation deployment solutions for Cloud Computing analytics. He is generally forced to attend these pointless conference calls littered with hold music produced by out-of-work men who still live at home with their parents.
“We have 75% of our team in Bangalore,” continued Mr. Cook. “We used to make them get up in the middle of the night, this being America ‘n all. But now they host the call, so I’m getting up at 2am three times a week. But at least this music is interesting.”
Here are some horrid examples of American conference call hold music.
- [sc_embed_player fileurl=”http://www.gishgallop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/03/hold_1.mp3″] Your call is not important
- [sc_embed_player fileurl=”http://www.gishgallop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/03/hold_2.mp3″] Failed attempts at funky
- [sc_embed_player fileurl=”http://www.gishgallop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/03/hold_3.mp3″] Later Phil Collins fail
- [sc_embed_player fileurl=”http://www.gishgallop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/03/hold_4.mp3″] Creepy Drum Machine Hand Clap
- [sc_embed_player fileurl=”http://www.gishgallop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/03/hold_5.mp3″] Unchallenging New Age Piano
- [sc_embed_player fileurl=”http://www.gishgallop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/03/hold_6.mp3″] Prog-Rock Imitation Fail
- [sc_embed_player fileurl=”http://www.gishgallop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/03/hold_7.mp3″] Ethnic pretentiousness, Just add bongos
- [sc_embed_player fileurl=”http://www.gishgallop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/03/hold_8.mp3″] “Royal-free” means crap
- [sc_embed_player fileurl=”http://www.gishgallop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/03/hold_9.mp3″] Out of ideas? Try this