California Drought Forcing Bears Into Town

Banner Mountain bear "Jeb" seen here waiting for his 24 orders of crepes at Nevada City's Classic Cafe. Source: the uncanny imagination of David C Jensen.
Banner Mountain bear “Jeb” seen here waiting for his 24 orders of crepes at Nevada City’s Classic Cafe. Source: the uncanny imagination of David C Jensen.

Nevada City, CA — California’s epic drought has taken a toll on not only its citizens, but also its animal populations. And no animal group has been impacted more than the Black Bear community, where both food and water has become scarce forcing them into human-populated areas. And nowhere is this more obvious than in the quaint and esoteric Sierra Foothills town of Nevada City, CA.

“Yeah, I was going into the Classic Cafe on Broad Street for a cup of coffee,” commented local legend and unemployed check writer Toby “Doob” Carnevale. “Well, I was going to see if they’d just give me a cup of coffee. Anyway, I walk in, and there’s this bear sitting at the counter eating a gigantic pile of crepes. Everyone was just standing there watching this bear eat. Taking pictures and sending text messages. So I just leaned over and helped myself to a cup of coffee.”

According to Nevada County animal control officials, earlier this week, two Banner Mountain bears known as Jeb and Seth made their way down Gracie Road and into downtown Nevada City. Witnesses reported seeing them in the back of an old Dodge pickup truck. As they made their way up Broad Street, Jeb entered into the Classic Cafe, made famous by the Hallmark made-for-TV movie The Christmas Card. Jeb proceeded to sit down at the counter and order 24 crepes, a dozen eggs over-easy and an entire pot of coffee. Black Bear Seth preferred the dumpster bins behind the National hotel.

“I’ve never seen anyone or anything eat like that,” said Nevada City resident Julia Ono. “But I have to say, that bear was quite well-mannered. I mean, he didn’t talk or anything. He just shoveled food into his mouth. When he was done, he stood up, nodded at the lady behind the counter, and walked out the door.”

Although the entire breakfast bill was close to $96.00, owners of the Cafe say that they’re not going to press charges against the bear because, well, he’s a bear. They did mention that they hope Jeb will enjoy the delights of Ike’s Quarter Cafe next time he visits Nevada City for a meal.

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