Beale Airforce Base, CA — Proving that “all work and no play makes Johnny a dull boy,” recently promoted chemtrail pilot Barry Kenner of Marysville, CA, saw an opportunity to express his humorous side recently and decided to augment a cloud that resembled a male human organ. He was on his 4th chemtrail spraying deployment since receiving a much-deserved promotion this past month from a mere cloud-seeding pilot.
“Contrary to what many people think, I have a lot of freedom up here to spray at random,” said Captain Kenner, who visited Gish Gallop offices in Penn Valley, CA. “Although I don’t normally deviate from the recommended flight plans, I couldn’t resist this gag. I hope everyone on the ground got the prank.”
Not everyone on the ground found the prank funny.
“The deliberate re-factoring of our environment is no laughing matter,” said Nevada City’s self-appointed anti-geoengineering/chemtrail activist and spokesperson Sairhra Ramun. “The fact that forces are trying to control and manipulate out-of-control climate change by poisoning the sky with aluminum, barium, coal ash, fluoride, bits of Oprah and Haldol is no laughing matter. This pilot’s attempt at humor is both chauvinistic, patriarchal, and unfunny. The sheeple need to look up and wake up.”
What About Those Without a Psychiatrist?
Anti-chemtrail activists who are not under the guidance of a psychiatrist maintain that chemtrail spraying of our skies is not only counterproductive in terms of climate modification, it is effectively hastening the death of the planet’s biosphere. This is witnessed by admitted correlations between unexplained human illnesses such as stomach and digestive issues, to the inability to get off the Internet. They also point to the die-off of trees and plant life on the West Coast of the United States as proof of chemtrail operations.
Actual climate scientists unanimously agree that the plant and animal life on the West Coast of the United States is stressed due to the presence of a 500-year drought. They also generally encourage chemtrail believers to seek counseling and not new Internet websites that promote other confirmation bias.
As for freshman Captain Kenner, he says his fans will have to wait a few weeks for his next prank.
“At the academy in Colorado, I was called the Joker,” said a smiling Capt. Kenner. “I was the class prankster. But I have to be careful with my new job not to overdo it considering how much operational liberty the Gates Foundation gives us, you know? You don’t want to look a gift cloud in the mouth. You know what I mean?”