Washington D.C. — The United States Federal Reserve Bank announced today that it believes that as much as $240 million dollars in spare change is hidden in various American furniture. Speaking in front of the tax policy House Ways and Means Committee, Federal Reserve Chief Janet Yellen expressed concern that there was millions of untaxed dollars lurking literally underneath the seats of average Americans.
“At our meeting earlier this month,” said Ms. Yellen, “the Committee judged that the case for an increase in the target range had continued to strengthen and that such an increase could well become appropriate relatively soon if incoming data provide some further evidence of continued progress toward the Committee’s objectives. This judgment recognized that progress in the ‘under seat’ revenue stream we’ve identified. The spare change market has gone untapped for decades now and that economic activity could be well-stimulated by examining this often misunderstood income opportunity.”
According to Ms. Yellen, as much as a quarter billion dollars of untaxed income might exist in American’s couches, recliners, car seats and drink holders. And more startling, she maintained that there was a whopping $150 million stored in forgotten jars stored in attics and basements. She recommended that the Federal Government look into to taxing such ‘hidden revenues’ to help pay for the large government expansion proposed by President Trump.
“Speaking for myself,” continued Ms. Yellen, “I found over $1.42 in my car just today. And that was just on the driver’s side. I can’t image how much I’ll find on the passenger’s side, let alone the back seat.”
Ranking Ways and Means Committee chairman Kevin Brady (R-Texas) expressed concerns about this new potential revenue stream.
“I have a lot of respect for Janet,” said Representative Brady speaking to CNBC this afternoon, “But I gotta tell you, I don’t this will fly with Americans. I appreciate her attempts to focus on Trump’s growth plans, but this is not the way to pay for military and infrastructure spending.”
Representative Brady said he had no plans to move Ms. Yellen suggestion out of committee and onto the House floor for debate.