Cyberspace — A Facebook argument broke out earlier this week when a self-proclaimed “Flat Earther” accused a believer of the competing Hollow Earth Theory that he was not only out of touch, but also dangerously wrong. The discussion started like most in the popular ILLUMITARDI Facebook Group, with the Flat Earthers starting an incendiary conversation about how everyone else needs to wake up and stop being “sheeple.”

All was going as planned with the Flat Earthers, successfully out-shouting everyone else until Dwaine Hyatt, a believer in the Hollow Earth Theory had enough.

“I’m tired of all these flat-earth types getting all the attention,” said an annoyed Mr. Hyatt in a Gish Gallop email. “It’s because their ‘theory’–and calling it a theory is generous at best– is easier to understand for the uninitiated whereas the hollow earth hypothesis has been proven throughout the centuries with varying degrees of empirical inquiry. It requires some serious thinking.”

The Hollow Earth hypothesis proposes that the planet Earth either is entirely hollow or otherwise contains a substantial interior space. The scientific community has dismissed the notion since at least the late 18th century, which hasn’t stopped the chronically stupid from believing it.

The Flat Earth conspiracy is a collection of varying arguments for, as the name suggests, a flat earth. Obviously, this theory is extraordinarily stupid, as a 7-year-old with two sticks on a sunny day can disprove it. However, often these factions disagree on some of the finer details of this theory, but all believers maintain that the Hollow Earthers are ignorant assholes.



“Dwaine is one such amateur,” said Flat Earther Sam Shenton in a lengthy, rambling and somewhat manic Gish Gallop voicemail. “It’s one thing for the normal sheeple not to understand the implications of a flat earth. Any idiot would understand that’s just a part of the learning process. However, the hollow earth morons don’t seem to understand simple physics. They also seem ignorant of God’s word in the Bible.”

At the time of this writing, the so-called “Young Earthers,” or those that believe that the planet is somewhere between 5,700 and 10,000 years old, had not yet commented on the discussion thread, but ILLUMITARDI Facebook administrators think that they will chime in shortly.

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LAST_OF_THE_MEHICANSAndrija SekulicAri AsulinSkankHunt42THE_PENIS_GOD100 Recent comment authors
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Ari Asulin
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Ari Asulin

Science Experiment: A solid metal sphere conductor with a charge applied to it would have an equal charge at all points on the sphere. No magnetic poles, and no Van Allen Belts. Now, make that a hollow sphere with holes at the poles, and now you have a #teslacoil. This creates a magnetic North and South pole as the Magnetic Current (look it up) flows from inside and back out in a giant loop. This is the shape of the Earth, and the reason for the Van Allen belts shooting out of the polls. Compass proves the earth is HOLLOW

Ari Asulin
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Ari Asulin

NASA is a #sciencefiction created after WW2 to hide the secrets of the world: The earth is hollow and has an inner sun. The moon is small and close (within the Van Allen Belts). Gravity is really Electromagnetism, unrelated to Mass. Spacetime does not exist. Dark matter does not exist.

THE_PENIS_GOD100
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THE_PENIS_GOD100

“Obviously this theory is extraordinarily stupid, as a 7-year-old with two sticks on sunny day can disprove it”. Except numerous tests have been done and no curve has been seen. How about you do some fucking tests and report back before you go insulting shit you can’t understand

Andrija Sekulic
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Andrija Sekulic

Have your meds kicked in yet?

SkankHunt42
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SkankHunt42

its so adorable when shills have no rebuttle

SkankHunt42
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SkankHunt42

its so adorable when shills have no rebuttle

Andrija Sekulic
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Andrija Sekulic

Even more adorable when they have no *rebuttal, fam. Take the meds. And an English class, while at it.

SkankHunt42
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SkankHunt42

take this dick while you are at it too

SkankHunt42
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SkankHunt42

take this dick while you are at it too

Andrija Sekulic
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Andrija Sekulic

You’d have to have one to offer one, bitch 😉 Sit down and shut up.

LAST_OF_THE_MEHICANS
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LAST_OF_THE_MEHICANS

let me nut in your ass while I sing the mehican anthem

Buttonit
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Buttonit

The link to the Illumitardi Facebook group is defunct, due to the group being shut down last week. Here’s a link to the new one – https://www.facebook.com/groups/SHILLUMITARDI/