Penn Valley, CA — It is with great sadness that Gish Gallop announces the passing of esteemed correspondent Parker Sloanberg.
According to sources within the Iraqi Military, his body, and the bodies of several hundred ISIS rebels where found dead at a remote base camp in Northern Iraq. According Dr. Khalid al-Maaly of the Iraqi Medical Brigade or IMB, the entire encampment was stricken with Ebola and died in the past week.
“It appears that Mr. Sloanberg was the Ebola vector,” said Dr. al-Maaly in a phone interview with Gish Gallop President Lou LaPlante. “He must have brought it with him when he was kidnapped last month. Subway Sandwich shops in Syria are known harbors of the Ebola Virus.”
Many Gish Gallop readers enjoyed Mr. Sloanberg’s scoops on Bigfoot sightings, Alien Abduction blogging, regional poop and excrement reports and of course his most recent dispatches from Syria and Iraq on his “self-assignment.”
“There will never be another like Parker,” said Lou LaPlante in an official Nevada County Gish Gallop statement. “I ask you to name one reporter–one–who had the skill and breadth and courage that Parker did. There is a huge hole in the journalism world today.”