Obama Adds Own Face to Mount Rushmore

President Obama plans to insinuate himself on Mount Rushmore National Memorial
President Obama plans to insinuate himself on Mount Rushmore National Memorial

Keystone, South Dakota — Construction began this week on a project that will add the likeness of President Obama to the Mount Rushmore National Memorial. It is the first major construction on the iconic monument since 1941.

Planning for the project began four years ago when President Obama signed an executive order to add his own face to the monument alongside sculptures of former Presidents George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, Theodore Roosevelt, and Abraham Lincoln.

Work has already begun.
Work has already begun.

The project was initially delayed when geologists reported that, due to a buildup of nano-aluminum deposits that result from chemtrail spraying, the granite cliff that holds the monument was not strong enough to support the planned construction. The first proposed solution, creating an Obama head that would hover fifty-feet above the rest of the monument, was nixed as it required public use of alien technology the government has so far denied possessing.

On a suggestion from President Obama the project committee decided to simply construct Obama’s face over the existing sculpture of George Washington. The swap will remove Washington from the monument, however the committee agreed that the symbolism of the change, conveying changing times in the United States, will enhance the monument overall.

The project has created hundreds of well paying jobs for the local economy, most of which have been filled by Syrian refugees under President Obama’s Jobs for Muslims program. Additional federal dollars are being used to build several large mosques in the nearby town of Keystone, South Dakota to accommodate the growing local Muslim community. While the mosques are being built with Muslims in mind, all local citizens have been strongly welcomed to attend prayer services.

Syrian Jobs
Thousands of Syrians coming to America to take part in Obama’s Jobs for Muslims program.

The project is not without controversy. The government expects thousands of protesters to arrive at the monument. To ensure that concerned citizens are cared for, the Federal Emergency Management Agency has built a camp thirty miles from the monument that will provide protesters with housing and other basic needs, as well as a designated space to protest.

Gish Gallop first learned of the events at Mount Rushmore from North San Juan resident Cody Campbell, who claims to have witnessed planning and construction activities during remote viewing sessions at his apartment.

To corroborate his claims Campbell surveyed shoppers at the Sierra Super Stop near his residence. The shoppers that did not ignore Campbell’s prompting did confirm that the project “sounds about right” and that they “put nothing past him (President Obama).”

President Obama was not available for comment at press time.

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Ridiculous.

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Ridiculous.