Pokémon Training Gym Busted For Selling Performance Enhancing Drugs

Police are asking for leads in a vast Pokemon doping crime.
Police are asking for leads in a vast Pokemon doping crime.

Nevada City, CA — Pokemon Go! has taken our country by storm. Everyone, even politicians are getting in on it. Pokemon “Gyms” have even popped up for people to train their Pokemon for battle. But some have simply taken it too far.

Sal’s Trainers located in the back room of the historic Alpha building on Broad Street, has been raided by police and DEA agents after the trainers were caught selling and injecting performance enhancing drugs (PED) in to their Pokemon. There have been two deaths so far after the human growth hormone caused two Pokemon to implode.

One of the Players who were caught buying PED for her Pokemon , Rhonda Frazier, spoke with Gish Gallop.

“I didn’t think we broke any laws, hell they are Pokemon they don’t have rights!” Yelled Frazier. “They arrested my Pikachu that I had since it was a baby, I just want my baby back!”

Several locals as well as two unnamed City Council members are under investigation for enhancing Pokemon, but none have been charged in the bust at the time of this writing.

Police are asking people to be on the lookout for several “juiced” Pokemon, as they are considered dangerous and volatile. Do not approach them, call your local master trainer to handle them instead.

avatar
  Subscribe  
Notify of