Sanders Cleans Washington D.C. Homes with Kirby Vacuum

Senator Bernie Sanders seen here vacuuming Lauretta Dunnigan of Washington D.C.'s living room.
Senator Bernie Sanders seen here vacuuming Lauretta Dunnigan of Washington D.C.’s living room.

Washington, D.C. — As the hopes of receiving the becoming the 45th President of the United States didn’t pan out, Vermont Senator Bernie Sanders is changing tactics to reach out to his people by going door-to-door in a Washington D.C. neighborhood offering to vacuum homes. The effort, which political analysts have called desperate, hoped to draw attention to Sanders as a “working person” who “doesn’t wear fancy clothes” and “doesn’t take money from special interests to get elected.”

“It’s important for the people to know that Bernie Sanders doesn’t wear expensive clothes,” said a snarky  and visibly irritated former Sanders surrogate Jeff Weaver in a CNN interview earlier in the day. “No Gucci, no Armani. He’s an average person who knows how the American people are suffering. This vacuum campaign has been a complete success and I think you’ll see an  up-tick in his support as well as cleaner D.C. homes.”

The Clinton campaign was criticized when she gave a speech on income equality wearing what has been reported as a $12,000 Armani jacket, leading Sanders supporters to claim that the presumptive Democrat Presidential nominee is “out of touch” with average Americans. Many Americans simply saw it as another misfire of Hillary Clinton’s wardrobe choices. Clinton dismissed the allegations and has commented that such lavish clothing had nothing to do with her loss and attributed her defeat to “loser Sanders supporters, James Comey of the FBI and various pizza-loving Russians.”

Bernie Sanders, sensing an opportunity, took to vacuuming Washington D.C. homes using a Kirby Vacuum, which some saw resembled the Armani jacket.

“It was dinner time when someone knocked on the door,” said Washington D.C. system analyst and mother of three Lauretta Dunnigan. “Jim [Lauretta’s husband] answered the door and Bernie was there with a Kirby vacuum. He told him we voted for Hillary, but he just brushed past him and started vacuuming our living room. He did a pretty good job, I have to say.”

At the end of the evening, according to a Sanders spokesperson, Bernie had vacuumed over 27 homes and gained an additional 21 fans for cleaning activities.