Washington, D.C. — In a surprise announcement, which some analysts are saying is politically motivated by a shaky stock market, Vice President Mike Pence at the urging of Donald Trump announced during an impromptu press conference that the United States would join the United Kingdom and leave the European Union.

The announcement, which surprised both liberals and conservatives, was made to upset Western NATO allies and bolster the strength of Russia.

“President Trump has listened to the American people,” said Vice President Mike Pence in the early morning press conference. “And he thinks this move will help show Americans that we’re not messing around anymore. He wants people to know that he’s putting America first again. And that along with the United Kingdom, we are going to take back our sovereignty.”

In June 2016, the United Kingdom voted to leave the European Union by a narrow 51.9%. The campaign to leave the EU was driven by mostly uneducated and under-informed voters who thought the vote was for removing Muslims and other immigrants from the country who they perceived as “taking away jobs.”

One of the “Brexit” leaders, Nigel Farage, has since become a Donald Trump supporter. He is rumored to have been offered a cabinet position if the billionaire real estate mogul gets elected. According to Trump insiders, he wanted to “cut Chancellor of Germany Angela Merkel and those dumb ‘Frenchies’ off at the pass” by offering his executive order removing the United States from the European Union.

Critics Speak Out

“This is another example of how Donald doesn’t understand how the world works,” said House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, speaking on the MSNBC show Morning Joe. “His craven abuse of power is evident to all Americans. He’s also said that he would not only remove us from the EU but also NAFTA, the TPP, the NAACP, NATO, and AARP. If you can believe that.”


Later in the day, Mr. Pence was interviewed by CNN’s Anderson Cooper. When challenged by Cooper about why the United States should leave an organization, it’s not even a part of Mike Pence bristled.

“This is the kind of thing that has Americans fed-up,” continued an irritated Mr. Pence. “This constant ‘gotcha’ journalism. I don’t speak for President Trump, but I know he wants what’s best for America. And that means cutting the ties with organizations that do not have America’s interests at heart.”

According to Mr. Pence, the United States has 14 days to change its mind on the controversial separation, after which time the European Union will do nothing.