Trump Bans Sale Of Girl Scout Cookies To Iran

Iran won't be able to receive its annual shipment of 200 million Girl Scout cookies this year thanks to President Trump.
Iran won’t be able to receive its annual shipment of 200 million Girl Scout cookies this year thanks to President Trump.

Washington D.C. –– President Trump continued his agenda today by issuing a shipment ban on Girl Scout Cookies to the Islamic Republic of Iran. Iran, who imports 200 million boxes of Girl Scout cookies annually is upset and vows retaliation.

Girl Scout Leader Pam Hodges spoke to Gish Gallop about the ban.

“This only hurts the girl scouts, the lost revenue will impact our summer camps,” said and upset Ms. Hodges, fiddling with something inside her purse. “I guess on the bright side, maybe this will lead to better teeth in the Iranian population. and it might mean more Thin Mints for us.”

Iranians are outraged at the ban, the lack of Samoas and Thin Mints which will make watching be-headings a lot less fun.

Iranian Hamid Aboullah spoke to Gish Gallop.

“How can we come together as a family to watch infidels beheaded without Thin Mints,” said an outraged Mr. Aboullah. “It is an integral part of our families well-being, Trump will pay for this!”

Shipments have been halted in all major ports around America, the backlog of cookies is expected to create a glut of cookies in the United States, eliminating the black market for thin mints after sales end.

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